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Day 35 : Solution for a broken heart

February 24, 2021


I was helping a friend of mine today because her boyfriend leave her and she needed support. I know that my support is not like the support her other friends are bringing to her because she told me that. I told her that I will not stand beside her and listen her cry all day and do nothing about it.  It is okay to cry but it is important to not fall into the self- pity and the depression. She know that when she call me , things are moving and actions are taken.  We made a huge clean up, we install the new furniture etc. The place was  a total messy disaster and she was too but, she took actions anyways because, I told her that someone who really want to change and do what it takes to feel better is way more interesting to help than someone who is crying in his bed all day long and complain that life is too hard. I explain her my definition of what real love is and why her relationship as failed, and she said she understood but I know that this is not really true because, I know what it is to be in her shoes, we all know because we all have been lied about every fucking thing in our life, including love.

I am planting seeds in her mind since a long moment from now and I believe that this is a good moment to present her the tools, because she is in a really bad state so she need a solution because her little happy bubble is bursting and now she seems ready to listen to me. I am working on this for so long now that I don't know when is supposed to be the right moment to present it to her. She saw me change really fast in the last year and I became more stable than her in such a short period of time and I was completely out of this world, entirely disconnected from reality and she was terribly worried for me and now it is like it was normal and that I always have been like that which I found weird because we know each other since we are 5 years Old.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that being ruthless is the only way to wake up people from their delusion and by ruthless I mean being 100%  honest about the bullshit that the other beings  do or say and don't let their secret mind full of bullshit win on them.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to explain  to my friend that love based on energy will automatically failed one day or another and believe she was understanding what I was saying.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have wait for her to be in a terrible state to really want to show her the tools when I should I have created a bigger desire before that happen.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think that there is a right moment to present the tools when in fact, the right moment doesn't exist.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself use the fact she never mention how crazy it is to change that fast to protect my fear of doing her a presentation. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to forget about the fact all beings are pre-programmed and in the system and that they are not processing everything I can say sometimes. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to doubt of my capacity to close her on the idea of starting to use the tools.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to seek for her congrats about the me who has make huge progress during the last year which is pure ego. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to assume that because we know each other for 20 years means that we really deeply know each other in term of physical reality we in fact know each other from a big part only by ego. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that when she said she was worry for me it was based on energy as well and that wasn't real.

I realize that I am supposed to be confident enough to show her the real solution to all her problem and that I should use the fact I was completely fuck before to sold her instead of seeking for her congrats. I also realize that I wanted her to notice my change because it is something I was seeking from my mother when I was a child, my mom was never telling me she was proud of me or that I was awesome and positive comments like that so I can see that it comes from there.

I commit myself to make the presentation of the tools to my friend.

I commit myself to assist myself with breathing.

I commit myself to show the world that everyone have been pre-programmed about everything including love and show them the right direction to take.

I commit myself to always live all my relationships\ friendship based on actions and not emotions or feelings. 


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